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Showing posts with label the present.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the present.. Show all posts

Friday, March 26, 2021

The Present.

                                           The Present

Hello everyone, Today I will be telling you about my story called The present. This story is written in first person a recount and it is inspired from a video. The video is called the present (that was a link to the video shh don't tell.) The story is full of description and describing words. I worked hard on this story and I hope you enjoy as I enjoyed it too. Here it is

“Emo crybaby” the words went through my mind. I was so depressed. I was on my video game in my favourite blue hoodie trying to hide the scars from the bullies. It was after school and I wanted to get my mind out of it. The rug was soft, the chips were delicious and the room was dark just how I like it.


I heard the door open and I kept trying to keep my mum away from me. I just kept my eyes on the video game. My mum did her normal motherly things. 


She starts to annoy and distract me. She puts a box in my face and opens the blind that whitens my eyes for a second. She talks about something and this is what I heard

“Blah blah blah why don't you open the present I got you.” and I say

“For me” confused, with a tilted head.


I opened the box in silence and something popped out, frightening me. the caramel cloud stared into my soul. The fluff was soft like a feather. I realised it was a beautiful caramel puppy and my face brighted up, until… I realised the dog had three legs and I threw him away in disgust.


The chocolate nosed dog lay on the cloudy carpet looking around until he saw a cheery red ball under the table. His tail wagged and I keep my eyes on the video game trying not to get distracted. He started to play with the ball and being the puppy he is he stumbles down and the box landed on the poor dog's head. I giggled then turned to the TV before the dog got out of the box. He gave me the ball and I kicked him away.


He tried again to get my attention. I gave up and threw the ball. It was so cute and my smile showed itself. The dog came back and I say “OK Caramel” and we went outside.


I get my crutches and limped my way to the yard with the blood red ball in my hoodie. Throwing the ball I giggled. I guess it's fine to be different.

Thursday, August 13, 2020

the present

Hello readers how are you today. today I will be showing you my present writing hope you egoy.

                                                    
I used google dokes. I like my writing the dog is playful like me and is very silly I can be muchore and silly. what do you think of my writing. 

Wednesday, July 29, 2020

opening sentence for my story the present.

hello readers and friends today I will be showing you what how I improved my first sentence of my story from boring to amazing. my w.a.l.t was writing an interesting first sentence to hook our reader. my first sentence was "One day I was at the adoption center waiting for a human to take me to a home." This was my improved sentence "It was a sunny day at the bright adoption center I was waiting for a human to take me to a home". we had to use the hook. this is an Image.
          
I like my work. please tell me what you think about my sentence chang.